It's hard to be yourself when others make you want to be someone else.

Edward Cullen is a What Now?
angry, wreath, bitter, christmas, donald duck
How do you make an online journal entry that no one gives a crap about more interesting?

That's the question I've been thinking about for...about half of the day, since I decided I would breathe some life into my dusty, cob-web covered LiveJournal page today (which I first had to dust off).
I was thinking I could write these entries like a story or something like that, but that wouldn't work, I finally realized. There are several reasons for that, but I'll spare you the explanations, mainly because I don't know what they are, I just simply know that the idea wouldn't work.
I could insert some more links to pics and vids and stuff...that seems like a better idea. I think I might go with that one.
Unless someone gives me a better idea. But, since no one reads this, and because this is purely for my own enjoyment, I guess, I won't get a better idea from anyone.

I finished a quiz on Facebook and was looking at a list of others beneath it (because I was bored), and I saw one entitled, "Are you a whore?" and the picture for the quiz was of Edward Cullen. I nearly spit the milk I was drinking.
And that, my friends, is the explanation for the title. Hopefully, it served its purpose and got you to read this entry. Subject titles could be another means of gaining interest. Thanks for the inspiration, Edward.

I'm really itching to write a couple fanfictions for a series that just ended that I really enjoy, and I have one that's uncompleted, but I feel it's kinda stupid and I have writer's block, now. So we'll see what happens.

So tomorrow I have to wake up at 7 so I can be picked up by my friend Em at 8 and clean carpets for someone at 9. We're doing this fundraiser for the local historic society, that's why we're doing that. We're trying to raise 1,000 dollars. It's a tough goal, but we'll try our best. We're called the Steam Team.

So I'm going to go write or something, because my writer's side is begging me to.

I'm proud of myself for keeping this entry short. Hooray for me! Next time, I'll focus on it being interesting. 

Also, I think they should have rainbow text color, but they don't, which makes me weep. Not really.

Until next entry,

P.S. Please suggest some good music for me to listen to. I'm searching for some.

Tired and Frustrated
angry, wreath, bitter, christmas, donald duck
So I come here tonight to rant. Seriously, I'm just that irritated right now.

Saturdays never go good for me anymore. I wake up at around 6:30am and then drive to my dads, then have breakfast and then leave for dance around 8:30-:40. And then I go to figures, the last three weeks were two hours (although I missed last week, but we tried seeing where they would be held and didn't see anyone at either location we might have classes at, so we concluded there wasn't any practices that week), but now that parade practice has started, its only an hour and a half, and it's after the parade practice which lasts an hour.

And I started doing figures...four weekends ago. Well, next week I'm not staying for figures. I'm leaving after parade practice if I can. Why? Because I have no group. I'm like a third wheel. I have no group, and I don't fully know the dances because I'm not in a group and never get the opportunity to pop in and dance with a group to actually learn it. My teacher simply expects me to know the dances off the top of my head, or by watching the other groups. But how far can a girl get by observing? Not far, that's how far. So last week I was only able to step in twice during the two hours I was there. This week I only stepped in once and attempted to do a dance called Two Tunes, I think. And then when the teacher called the group over I told her that I didn't know the dance and so she sent me over to the munchkin group to watch and learn it, but that didn't really happen, and out of nowhere everyone changed to practicing another dance in which I'd started learning before. And so I spent my hour and a half reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.

And the parade routine is pretty darn simple. Granted, there are a lot of little kids this year, but I know we've done some more complex things than this. I'll have to wait and see what we do next week. But this week it seemed like we'd learned over half of the dance already.

And my sister is going to start private lessons before class on Thursdays with the teacher's daughter, and they're free lessons. And the teacher's daughter LOVES my little sister. She doesn't give a shit about me. No one, apparently, that teaches does. I don't get any private lessons, but my sister does.

And so all of this has put me into a very, very, VERY bad mood, and I think I might be a little depressed because of it. Sounds stupid, huh? Well I can't help it. It's just so unfair. IIIII was the one who wanted to do figures so bad, and I even talked to the teacher one day about it. But who gets the offer? Who gets to go? My sister does. Not me, my sister. Not fair.

I went with my friend Em and her sister, her mother, and her mother's sister to see Coraline in 3D. One creepy but spectacular movie, I'll tell you that. You should definitely go see it! It seems like something Tim Burton would have done, but surprisingly enough, he had nothing whatsoever to do with Coraline, which is a shame.

So, I'm going to keep this short, and I'm sorry if some of this seems sloppy and badly written and if there are a lot of typos because I'm very tired (it's one in the morning and I woke up at 6:30am this morning. How I managed to stay up so late is a miracle and a mystery to me.

Today was the start of a Tokka Valentines Week celebration-y thing on, but I didn't even get close to finishing my first prompt, so, you know, I definitely fail...epically. And I think that what I have so far is pretty suckish. Oh well. If I don't get it out in time, I'll try to post it at some point, at least.

Okay, so now that I've done my fair bit of ranting, and because I'm tired, I'm going to end this here and say goodnight and all. Oh, and I hope the people who went to the open-casting for extras auditions for the Avatar movie to protest had a successful endeavor and I hope a lot of people showed up. I wish I could have been there, so badly. They/You have no idea.



The Worrying is Over...For Now
angry, wreath, bitter, christmas, donald duck
So, I finally finished midterms, and I actually didn't do as bad as I thought I would! Hooray! I passed all of my midterms. Another hooray!

So a couple weeks ago I was forced to buy lunch, and so I was squirting some ketchup into a little paper cup for my french fries when it randomly shot me in the eye, and the arm, with a speck of ketchup. Yuck! So I have to grab a paper towel and wipe it off. My message to you all: Ketchup is better on french fries, not your eyes!

I was in German class one Friday recently, and we were readying ourselves for our speaking exams coming up the next Monday. The teacher had given us all a picture, and we had to describe it. He wanted our description to be a half of a minute to a minute long, and so he gave us some time to think and ready our descriptions, and then he grabbed a mic and had us pass it around to one another and share our descriptions. So, this one kid Joe opts to go first, and his is pretty well constructed and brief. After he goes, the teacher tells him to pick another student to go next, and, who does he pick? Of all the kids in the class? Me. Yup! Me. So I'm forced to share my description, which, for lack of a better word, shit. And I go along for about four minutes, mumbling and trying to come up with some decent and well-composed and in proper German, before I turn my head up to the teacher and ask, "is that good enough?" and he replies, "Yeah, you've been done for about for minutes. I was just waiting for you to finish. It was a long, run-on sentence, I didn't want to interrupt." *que laughter from class* And all I say is, "Oh." and then I hand the teacher the mic and hope that someone goes next, and soon. And thankfully, someone does, and my moment of humiliation is over. But I'm still sitting there mentally going, *headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk*, over and over again.

But after that class, I was telling a friend of mine, well, several friends, actually, that I was prepared to painfully and slowly and swiftly kill Joe one night before he goes to bed for causing me great grief and humiliation in class that day. See, Joe has some weird...fascination with me. I don't know how else to explain it. And I really wish he didn't. He's a bit of an odd kid.

Okay, so, um, not much else has happened in my life. Oh, but there was this incident in social studies class where a classmate of mine was attempting to sound smart by using big words, and he was one: using them incorrectly, and two: making up some of them. And he insisted that they were words, but I knew they weren't, and everyone began to listen to him as he "tried to prove to her that I'm smart" as he put it. Well, all I had to say to that was, "just stop now, Tom, before you embarrass yourself even more."

This past Saturday was one of those days where I wanted to crawl into a corner. Why? Depression. No, I don't go through depression a lot, but there have been a few occasions, some longer than others, in which I've faced depression head on, and let me tell you, it SUCKS. So, thankfully, some friend was online and was able to help me feel better, and by the end of the day I was my normal self.

Oh, on Friday I went over to my mom's friend's house to have dinner, and was stuck reading because I had no one to talk to or hang out with unlike my sister and my mom. (My sister was hanging out with my mom's friend's son who's around the same age as her, and my mom was having a nostalgic reunion with her old friend along with her friend).

And then on Saturday, I went to dance practice, but because I wasn't there last week because I thought there was no class when it was actually just pushed back to a later time, I found myself without a group and had to watch the whole class. I only got to step in and dance the routine twice during the time frame of two hours. Can you believe it? Two hours doing NOTHING. NOT how I wanted to spend my Saturday morning. I'd have rather slept in, like I normally do.

Well, I wish I had updated sooner, but unfortunately, that wasn't the case. But, at least I updated! Hooray for me being able to keep up with this! I'm doing so well so far!

I'll write again later.


Midterms--Everybody Hates 'Em
angry, wreath, bitter, christmas, donald duck

So apparently they've already started filming for the Avatar movie. Or at least, that's what I've heard. I cross my fingers and hope that it's not true and that the casting can still be changed. I mean, seriously, how can Paramount ignore a thousand letters that all focus on the same issue and demand them to fix it?


Okay, so I guess they can sorta ignore them pretty easily. But still, if they do, that'd be super bad for their reputation. Fans won't be happy and the media will definitely be on their back (backs?) about it.

Let's just see how things turn out, and if the casting is what it is now, THEN I'll blow a gasket, 'kay?

So midterms are coming up this week for me, and I'm utterly frustrated about them. That would explain the little froggy jumping up and down and cursing like there's no tomorrow.

I have to do three review packets (plus studying). I did as much of the math one I can, I can't figure out much in my German midterm review packet, which has managed to thoroughly convince me that I will FAIL epically, and I'm working on the science one. I've only left a couple blank on the science midterm review packet.

So, to say the least, I'm petrified, I'm paranoid, and I'm pessimstic about it. And, of course, frustrated.

Damn midterms. They'll be the death of me. Oh, and I can't wait until finals. They ought to be even better than midterms, I bet.

I'm going to straighten my hair for tomorrow. I don't do it often, but I decided to do it anyways. People have said it looks nice straight. It looks great curly, too, but it's nice to change it up a little. I don't do much with my hair most of the time. I just sorta wash it, brush it, and let it air dry (since blow dryers tend to make it poofy).

Well, I've definitely succeeded in making this entry shorter. So, hooray for me!

I'll post again later.

I'm out. (More like off to study. Hooray.)

Wish me luck with midterms if I don't post again in the next week, though the chances are that I will find time to post again.


Upcoming Events
angry, wreath, bitter, christmas, donald duck

Well, it's not like I was expecting an action movie, but action/adventure films sure make me wish that my life was just a little more entertaining and a little more interesting. Then again, don't we all wish that?

What that^^ has to do with the rest of my post, I have no clue. It's just kind of there. So... You know, just go about reading and ignore the random little paragraph above, 'kay?

I deleted my old posts, because, well, face it, who wants to read my stupid little babblings that are waaaaay longer than they should be?

A while ago (and by 'a while ago' I mean a month ago), I learned of this letter writing campaign started by someone here on livejournal, aang_aint_white. They started the campaign when the cast for the live-action Avatar movie directed by M. Night was posted and we all learned that the four main characters in book one were all white. That's right, white. And so fans are in an uproar and instead of whining on the internet or starting online petitions (which get you NOWHERE, by the way), we decided to write letters to Paramount about the casting decision. And this casting goes beyond the fact that Jessie friggin McCartney will be playing Zuko. It's about the fact that they are WHITE-WASHING the movie.
Anyways, I recently wrote a letter, and on January 14th I finally mailed my letters to Mark Bakshi and Frank Marshall and Kathleen Kennedy. Hooray for me! I can now officially say I've done what I can for the cause and I've done more than complain about it--I've done something about it!

My friend Em's birthday was on January 14th, and this weekend I took her to the movie theatres to celebrate. I (or my dad, rather) paid for the tickets and we went to see Bride Wars. Unfortunately, a lot of the seats were filled, and we ended up being forced to sit in the first three rows. But, besides that, and the obnoxious girl sitting next to me who would hum along with some music or chew her gum like a cow and then blow bubbles and pop them, it was fun, and I think she really enjoyed it.

I'm going to start to cut back on the sweets and do a few other things as a part of my new diet in order to look good for my England trip coming up in March, like my friend Em is doing. Let's hope it works.

Last week on Monday I was staying after school, and I was sitting on the ledge of a fountain that's in our school (a gift from the class of 2004, or some other year, I'm not sure which), with a couple friends, and my one friend takes a picture of me. Well, I don't like having my picture taken, so I leaned forward to grab his phone and delete the picture, and I disturb a book which consequentially disturbs my phone, sitting on the ledge, and it slides off of the ledge and falls into the water. Needless to say, it is now toast. I had tried to dry it off and save it, with the help of my technically-inclined friend Mike, but it was irrepairable. He said, and I quote, "your sim card is fried". And so, thus, I am left phoneless. But, the phone was three years old and it was scratched and I couldn't see the screen, anyways. And since it was three years old, I am now elligible for an upgrade, and so I'm going to get an iPhone. Sick, huh? It's a little superfluous for my needs, but oh well. It's still pretty handy, and you can't deny that that phone is excellent, putting all texting and internet and music options that it has aside.

Next week I'm going with my friend Em, (yeah, I mention her a lot) to see the Broadway version of the Little Mermaid. Her mom is treating her to the show as a birthday present. Me and our mutual friend Krissy are both going because we're Em's closest friends. I'm excited about it, just like she is. I've never seen a Broadway show before, and we both absolutely adore the Little Mermaid. (Yeah, I like a few Disney films, so kill me. There's a child in all of us, you know!) I know I'll be seeing another one later in England called Wicked. I'm not all that excited about that one because Glinda or whatever the heck her name is annoys the hell out of me. She's too preppy and bitchy, in my opinion. No wonder the "Wicked Witch" became so wicked!

I recently joined Facebook. It's actually not bad. I'm kinda glad I joined. So far, I have not been harrassed by any kids from school, but I'm still waiting for it to happen because I know it will.
And almost EVERY kid in school has an account on there. Mind you, there are about 2,000 kids in my school.

Well, that's about it for now.


EDIT: Damn, still rather long. I'll work on that.


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